A Tale of Two Cities

I'm moving again.  Moving countries, changing visas, swapping out cultures, food, friends, climates, and generally shaking everything up.

The good news is, I've done this before.  I could say I know what I'm doing, but it's more like I know what not to do, how to be graceful, grateful.  

I don't want to hold on
I want to love
everything
everyone
everywhere
and I do

They'll just never be in the same place.
And that's OK.

Leaving Christchurch is bittersweet.   It's not goodbye but see you later, come visit, stay in touch, who knows! I've made friends here, started building a community, and a life. A life that I'm consciously giving up to follow my heart, feel the wind on my face as I ride my scooter through a throng of traffic, eat spicy street food, leaving the security and pure beauty that is New Zealand behind for a freedom the west wasn't built for.

I'm going back to a place that I've lived, where I have friends, community, and generally know my way around.  That's not to say it will be the same.  That's not to say time won't have passed and my friends, community, and very town that I know in Bali won't be different, but I'm different.  Nothing is ever the same.  And that's OK.

Love,

Norma Jean

You can view all of my doodles, with everything I love on my website, Norma Jean Loves

I'm on your team, be on your team with me

They say you're pretty lucky if you can count your good friends on one hand.

Having connected with some great women around the world I consider myself luckier than most.

They're all amazing, capable, beautiful, lovable, empowering human beings, and it is such serendipitous magic that we're in each other's lives.

It's interesting though, as free-spirited, independent women we're all subliminally bombarded with messages, daily, about how we're not enough.

Because we're women, our value as humans is tied to our relationship status, age, demurity, niceness, size, money we have (or don't have) along with countless other irrelevant factors.

While sometimes difficult, it's important to utilize our strength to value ourselves.  In other words, be on your team! That's much easier said than done, and I personally find that it helps to have others on your team with you.

So most importantly, surround yourself with people who love you, so when those moments of doubt inevitably creep in, someone will remind you "I'm on your team, be on your team with me."

It's taken me a long time to even recognize that doubt, let alone be able to turn it off and breathe.  I'm lucky enough to have friends who encourage me to value myself, be on my team.

This is part of why I'm moving back to Bali, and part of why for the first time in my entire life, I made the decision to not take a job in front of me, and value myself more than expectations set before me.

Love,

Norma Jean

You can view all of my doodles, with everything I love on my website, Norma Jean Loves

One Thing Leads to Another

All we have out here is each other. So hang on tight.

When I watch Diego and Nyx rough and tumble across our floor I not only reminded of the miracle of their survival, but also the miracle of the human hearts ability to love during the most difficult times. Sure, I know what you might be thinking, "Hey crazy dog lady, it's just some dogs. Don't get too carried away." 

Well, what you might not know is that both of our little cuddle monsters came from homes filled with the love and compassion of migrant/refugees from the middle east who, with nothing of their own, still found time to love something that didn't deserve any of their precious time or limited emotional energy.

While worrying about their families safety, their human rights, their visas, sending money to their families, finding jobs, living without community - they still had space in their hearts to love something that couldn't even care for itself.  In Diego's case, they loved something that didn't even have the emotional capacity to really be kind to them in return. He loved them, but he couldn't control himself enough to always be kind.

Years later, Diego's rescue dad has become one of our dearest friends. He is an amazing person who works tirelessly in a stressful job to support his family that remains in Syria while also fighting for refugee status for - not only himself - but also the rest of his family so they can join him in Korea. During this struggle, he has still found time to reach out and help us when we have needed it. A fact that leaves us very humbled. 

So, when I see my puppies rough and tumbling around the floor I'm reminded that I am wealthy.  I'm reminded that I have the time and resources to help those around me.  I'm reminded that compassion is the answer, not fear.  I'm reminded that Syrian refugees aren't an abstract concept in the news. They are part of the reason my Diego lives in my house. The reason I have a car that drives even when I didn't have the money for parts. The reason the Harri-bou-bou has a friend to climb with on the weekends.  We sit here so blessed by this friendship and wonder how we can begin to give back.

Why do I write this? Because I want you to know when you support refugees you support people who make a difference in this world. You empower the best kind of people.  When I say support, I don't mean just money.  I mean give them compassion, give them an ear to tell their story, understand what they have given up to be there next to you, understand that they loved what they left behind, give them friendship when they are alone. Do this because sometimes when the world is darkest, you don't need money, you need hope.

Basically, I write this in hopes that one person somewhere will be motivated to reach out to someone next to them that looks different, that sounds different, that is struggling in a new home with a new language, and just say, "Hey, let's be friends." Because that's how things go from being abstract to concrete, and it's how we find what we need most in the world - each other... and puppies.

The Day to Day

Things have come so far.

These days I spend my free time the Korean way,

with friends.

And that usually means lunch 

with Jennifer and Sue.

Ladies Who Lunch

Ginseng Alcohol, just a little with lunch. Thank you 수영

Long lunches are possibly

one of the best parts of life.

Here side dishes were inspired.

Mid day is when we need to relax,

step back and assess our progress,

consider the direction of our path.

Hoping I can learn how to make this.  It's beyond delicious.

  I suspect this view of life

won't make me very successful,

but it sure has always made me happy.

My friends house is so cozy.  I want to move in.

The Wonderful Land of Oz!

Norma Jean joined the ensemble

not so long ago in a land called Anjung-Eup.

However, she ran away to star in her own drama

and give law school the old college try...

only to be side tracked by music and Bali.

We now join Norma Jean,

whose life is already in progress:

(This drama is filmed in front of a live studio audience)

Hello Australia!

 After being abroad for 3 years 

(and not having been home/ to a western country for 2) 

I decided to head off to Australia.

I lived in Bali for almost a year making my album, and came to Australia a few weeks ago to check out the music scene, play some open mics and connect with other musicians (hopefully to get a band together - but that's a whole other post!).  Hours before I boarded the plane,  I also lost my bank card, so this was a pivotal moment for me.  Realizing that I could stay in Bali and sort it out, or get on the plane, I chose the latter.  With grace, hope, $4 and infinite possibility I arrived in Australia!

The adventures have continued in Boomtown, also known as Perth, and they have been nothing but extraordinary!  I have experienced INCREDIBLE generosity, predictable selfishness and everything in between, have pet and eaten kangaroos (not the same ones ;), ridden a Harley, hiked in the outback, sang at few open mics (with a bunch more coming up), connected with the local music community and made friends that I will have for a lifetime!

It went a little something like this:

Beach

Kangaroos (the ones we pet!)

My new friend Stu and I 

playing at an Open Mic

Aboriginal Cave Art

They have NICE coffee (in the cutest cafes!)

The biggest lesson learned so far has been this:

The deciding factor in any experience is YOU.  If you decide things will work out, they will.  Choose your people discerningly, know that you are ALWAYS enough and that you carry the magic in you!

With LOVE from the Wonderful Land of OZ!

XOXO,
Norma Jean

Over the top - Nothing but BLUE SKIES :)

It's A Man's World

 All he wanted was a man's game for his birthday.

Oddly enough:

a woman brought the chips,

a woman won the game,

and a woman got is goat. 

Great job girls,

great birthday Scott.

Steph is taking it home.

"Yes"terday's Dinner

One of my all-time favorite shows is "Being Erica".

It helped give me the idea 

of moving to South Korea in the first place.

In the show there is a total tosser 

who writes a book called "The Power of Yes".

It was so ridiculous, but it got me thinking, 

"Why not?" 

Why not just say, "Yes" 

to everything I am offered?

So, for the last three years I've done just that.

This last weekend -

as I bit into some of the best 

meatballs, braciola, and Italian sausages

I've had in my life - 

I realized they tasted like, "Yes."

Each bite made you feel like life was 

easy, exciting, and rich.

Each mouthful made me want to say,

"Yes", to family.

"Yes", to friends.

"Yes", to adventure.

"Yes", to risk.

"Yes", to reward.

I know. I know.

That's a lot to read into a meal,

but when people cook you can taste who they are 

and/or who they want to be.

If they are afraid... you can taste it.

If they don't care... you can taste it.

If they are exhausted... you can taste it.

  

but at the same time

If they love... you can taste it.

If they dream... you can taste it.

If they live... you can taste it.

So, although I have only just met my lovely hosts,

I think they must be amazing people, because 

last night "yes" was rolled into every spicy 

meatball, braciola, sausage and rice ball.

Only Linda Ronstadt Really Gets Me

Oh, look at poor old pitiful me.

 There is no doubt 

my drama had gone stale.

The plot lines had dwindled 

and no cast had matriculated.

Sure, I could blame it on Korean's being cold,

or ex-pats being a bunch of twats,

but that's the easy way out -

blaming others for my isolation.

The truth is that I stopped trying.

I stopped reaching out.

I stopped going out.

I stopped planning things.

I stopped doing things. 

I had other priorities and it got out of hand.

However, for a moment I felt the blame trickling in.

For a minute I felt, "Poor me" settling into my constitutions.

"Poor me" I don't have any friends.

"Poor me" everyone left me.

"Poor me" it's so hard to meet people with the same interests.

"Poor me" I have to do everything myself.

So I called "Bullshit".

There is no poor me.

There is just me being stupid.

There is just me being selfish.

There is just me expecting other people 

to solve my problems.

 

I took responsibility.  I reached out.

Within minutes my life was booked out for months

because my friends are many and they are wonderful.

There was never any, "Poor me" 

there was just me being a dip shit.

 

 

Socrates Fan Girl

We found him all alone at an open mike many years ago.

He stood up there and he played his guitar 

and he sang his songs with an impressive intensity,

but when he walked off stage shyness enveloped him.

It was a gauntlet thrown at our feat.

Shoes, Rebeqa and I just couldn't resist him.

He was like a shiny new toy.

So, adorable, so talented, so shy.

We.... had... to... press... the... button....

 

So later, as we sat across the room 

from him and his friends at a pizza joint.

We screamed and swooned,

"Oh, it's Ahren."  

"Can you believe it?" 

"Is it really him!"

"Oh, I think he looked at me!"

 

We did it with commitment. 

 We did it relentlessly.

We were horrifyingly annoying.

A few months later,

Shoes tricked him into coming to Thanksgiving dinner.

 We must have done something right, though,

because he didn't run away screaming

when he was greeted in a similar fashion at our home,

"Ahhhh, it's Ahren!!!!" 

"He's at our house!!!"

For reasons we don't really understand,

he chose to keep hanging around,

and we feel so privilaged and lucky.

 

Now he has his very own awesome band

Socrates and the Lava Gods

And they have released their first music video.

Although Shoes, Rebeqa and I were Ahren's first 

screaming, swooning fans.

I know we wont be his last.

You can read Ahren's life blog here:

blogofahrenscholtz.wordpress.com

Trick or Treat?

"One's face is equal to or stupider then one's butt" - Strongbad

This year I celebrated a week of Happy Hallow Harry-Boo-Boo,

in honor of officially living with him longer then I've lived without him.

Somehow our circles continue to intertwine.

We've been through murder and high-water together,

so sometimes we hate each other,

sometimes we're sick of each other,

sometimes we can't stand each other's stupid faces.

However, we both know those times will pass,

and that said feelings have little to do with the other person,

and a lot to do with our own personal demons aquired

from a life filled with more then it's fair share of tragedy.

So, instead of putting so much focus on our feelings,

we just love each other despite the crazy,

despite our night terrors,

our anxieties,

our rage,

and despite the worlds that have crumbled around us.

So, I guess what I'm trying to say is that,

I love Harri-bou's smiley, 

never changing, 

always loyal,  

ever encouraging,

eternally supportive,

blindly devoted,

ever handsome,

stupid face.

Got'a Raise Em' Right

As a middle child,

I've seen the world from both sides now.

So when I was given temporary custody

of AL's little brother I took the job seriously.

Twenty four hours to influence the mind

of a jovial midwestern boy.

I made my list, I checked to make sure

we would be a little naught and a little nice.

Lance show Alyssa's kid bro and I the couchsurfing way.

After it was all said and done 

I think we did alright.

List of Top Accomplishments:

• Rode on a train for the first time.
• Toured a city his sister hadn't been to.
• Saw four cities in one day.
• Toured an art park.
• Experienced Korean foot massage paths.
• Kicked around in a river fountain.
• Tried one new Korean dish a day.
• Took a nap in the middle of a river at night.
• Ate silk worms from a can.
• Washed it down with soju & hot six.
• Couchsurfed on a fellow travelers floor.

One might say, 

this is my own version

of no child left behind.

Come On Baby Light Your Fire

My candle in the wind 

has lit up Bali like a wildfire.

"Talk to you" Bali Jolie

She's become the lead in her own drama. 

It's a musical actually.

It's about a girl who:

ran way to the islands 

rented a scooter

formed a band

and

recorded an EP.

The rough cuts are magic, 

the EP is going to be electric.

My beautiful lost thing

is finding her own way.

Bali Jolie on Facebook

UPDATE:
Check out me, Norma Jean, on facebook for all
performance updates, new songs, and other musical shenanigans! 

Gone Fish'n

As a beautiful surprise,

my magic friends from Japan called one evening

and said, "Mind if we come for a visit tonight?"

Then whisked me away on a surprise camping and fishing trip.

It was the kind of magical surprise

that makes you smile for a week.

Bye Bye Babbie, Goodbye

 For one brief moment,

Babbie returned.

Then she was gone.

Her smile.

Her laughter.

Her brightness.

Always,  

apologetically,

perfectly 

herself.

Summer Luv'n

When you have the best co-workers in the world

there is only on thing to do when summer comes around.

 Make everyone go to the lake for a BBQ.

 

I make potato salad and sauerkraut.

They bring the kimchi and meat.

We all bring our families and friends.

We all laugh and play in the sun.

  

When it's all said and done I don't think I know how to be a good expat.

It seems I'm just a little to interested 

in living a normal life

with the normal people 

who live in the normal country 

doing normal things.

 

I just want my life to be:

-well-

normal

happy

and a little bit

average.

I Got To The Top And Had To Stop

Sometimes only the mountains will do.

The smell of wood.

The rushing water.

I hop.

I jump.

I play

I recover.

I go to Min's in the Mountains.

인제군 인제읍 귀둔1리 5반 1004, Inje 252-804

Sit back, Relax, Put Your Feet Up.

Inside or Outside, even rainy days feel bright.

Find Eunbiryoung on Facebook. 

Winners and Losers

The only bad part, is saying goodbye in the morning.

Getting there isn't so hard,

but it is off the beaten path.

So pack your bags,

lock your doors,

and head for the mountains.

My Candle In The Wind

 You ignored me when I looked away.

You cornered me as I tried to escape.

I said, "I don't need any more friends"

and you never missed a breathe.

You said, 

"Do you want me to come over?"

and I said, 

"No, but if you have to go ahead."

and you came

and you staid

past you're welcome

until we were the friends

you told me we would be.

You've been my hooker with a heart of gold

You've been my Bridget on a fire pole.

 You're been my Chang.

 The intrepid sidekick.

The voice of un-reason.

But more then that.

You've been good people.

Always there with words of wisdom 

just before the credits roll.

Goodbye Norma Jean,

you're not frosting

you're cake

and

yours will not be a life wasted.

  

Practice Makes Perfect

The new grill, brats & a fresh pot of sauerkraut 

was burning a hole in our pockets.

So we had a little practice BBQ.

Tested it out on a new guest.

and agreed that this summer 

was going to be might fine indeed.

Cast Favorite Leaves After One Season

Goodbye Norma Jean

 After only one season,

cast favorite NJ will be headed 

out to head up her own, all new, law school drama.

However,  don't think this is the last you've seen of her.

We're currently in negotiations

for her to revive her Chang-like role 

in future "on location" episodes.