Desk warming, More like Heart Warming

My favorite spot for studying and thinking about things

For the last four years I've listened to teachers complain about something called desk warming.  This is where you are required to be at work, but actually have no required work to do.  In short, you have eight hours you need to be "at work" but you can do anything you want with this time.  Even as I write this I think, "How can anyone possibly hate this?"

Of course, I tried not to judge because, as a hagwon teacher I had not walked a mile in their shoes.  Yah, well, now I have walked in said shoes and I'm calling it, "The bitching and moaning is cray cray." This is my dream come true.  Weeks on end of eight straight hours where no one can bother me while I do my projects.  Let's see, what am I doing?

Writing books

Yoga

Studying Korean

Talking to my family

Blogging

Researching things

Practicing basketball & volleyball

Staring at the wall (my fave)

Looking at trees

Listening to sounds

Researching grad schools

(Eventually doing grad school)

Generally relaxing without being bothered

In short, it's the vacation I've always wanted.
Without the expectation to have fun, I can actually relax
and then go home to my own bed.

There is no way to meet anyone, go anywhere, or doing anything spectacular or interesting.  This is dedicated me time just for thinking and doing stuff.  This is so much cooler than the coolest job I could have dreamed of, because on top of this dedicated "me time" I'm also granted 20 vacation days for the adventures that I do want to have.

Even just now, I got tired of blogging, pulled out the yoga mat and did a bit work on my back.  You never even noticed, neither did my boss. Oh, wait, there went another good 30 minutes checking out Kpop dance tutorials. Once again, no one was bothered by my lack of focus or motivation.  Desk warming is my new favorite hobby.

Oh the books I will write, the restaurants I will review, the food swaps I will plan, the Korean students I will help.

Open to the Public

A warm wet wind blows in off the rice paddies, across my desk, and back out toward the dark clouds that hover over the distant mountains.  Outside my office Taylor Swift and Bigbang ring out from the flat screen TV while two boys cleaning the room have a dance party.  In twenty minutes I will teach my first class of the day, then take a rest before teaching my last class of the day.  At 4:30 I will say goodbye to my co-workers, hop on my motorcycle and go for a lazy ride home through farms and along a winding river.

This is my new life as a newly minted public school teacher after over four years of teaching at private acedemies.  It's taken a little while for me to get my sea-legs after the non-stop teaching I did before. For the first week I could barely stay awake, the start and stop pacing was not what I was used to, and it felt like I was waiting for the other shoe to drop.  How can I possibly be paid this much money to do a quarter of the work? When is the first parent going to call the school because I wasn't sending home enough homework? However, after a week I have realized this is all really as good as it seems.  I guess having experience at something is finally paying off.

These days I teach about ten classes a week and assist with another ten, previously I planned and taught thirty-five classes each week on my own while also managing the academies teaching schedules, new teacher training, etc.  Please understand, I am not complaining about my old job. I miss my old job.  My students spoke amazing English and could write thoughtful stories.  They made me laugh and sometimes cry.  I love my former coworkers, my boss, the freedom I had to teach.

However, sometimes you have to let go of the things you love because they need someone other than you to be the best they can be.  Stepping aside gracefully is the right thing to do at a time like that.  Hopefully I succeeded.

When I was a boy.

Somehow they aren't so little anymore. Junior High doesn't know what's coming their way.

Oh to be a boy. 

Following their little leader.

Trouble.

How all decisions are made.

Breakfast

Snacks

And of course they all buy some for Teacher.

Candid candy camera.

Working together.

Friends forever.

Everyone's favorite game, "Stop hitting yourself".

Assessing the situation.

Fear of the unknown.

The unknown.

Sheer terror.  We had to leave a man behind.

Two hour lines are nothing when you have a smart phone.

It was over too soon.  Now we must die.

Exhaustion.

Which means it's time for the arcade.

Everyone's favorite game... Diet Pigs.

A little reflection

On this day, the tribe accepted me as one of their own :)

No Retreat, Full Surrender

The warm glow of home.

 As I stand at the door of my third year in Korea,
it feels like the world is peeling back
and opening up around me.
So, of course, I stop to consider my choices.

On paper, I would never have chosen this life.
There are so many other "ideal" situations.
A plethora of smarter choices.
Yet, there is something inexplicably joyful
about making the best of what I've had,
even when it didn't look like my dream at first glance,
I soon discovered
I hadn't dreamed big enough.

So, here I am.
 Living the happiest version of myself
that I've met yet.

It's one of the best parts about being older.
Sitting still doesn't scare me much anymore.
I'm not interested in chasing new horizons,
although I still want to do new things.

When I look in the mirror I'm fine.
When I see my life I'm content.
When I see my to do list,
I know it will get done.
And even if it doesn't,
that's just fine.

And when people ask,

"When are you going back?"

All I can say is,

"I don't known when I will return to live in the US,

but there is one thing I know for sure,

I'm never 

'going back'".

Year 1:
Two years ago this was brand new:

http://chasingatale.blogspot.kr/2011/02/point-to-point-b.html

Year 2:

Then a year passed and I was brand new:

http://chasingatale.blogspot.kr/2012/02/reflection.html

"Nice to Meet You" and Other Stupid Things Koreans Say

Each time I sit down to study Korean I discover new linguistic differences that explain many of the "mistakes" made by Korean speakers.  Each time I feel my heart break just a little bit as well.  The first reason my heart breaks is because I realize that, we English teachers, spend far too much time making fun of students, and far too little time trying to understand why they might make the same mistakes over and over again.

However, my heart is mostly heavy because I see how much Koreans are ridiculed for their English mistakes (even though they are making an effort to communicate in a new language while their teachers often make no effort) as if they are "stupid" for making them.  I've most certainly engaged in this without thinking, but no more.

First, let's look at how we judge our kids when they use "nice to meet you".  In Korean this is a perfectly normal expression to say over and over again, each time you "meet" a person.  In fact, it's the polite thing to do to your elders.  You are meeting, and it's nice.  For Korean students, it's hard to grasp that - in English - this is tied only to a FIRST meeting.  Students don't understand why it isn't always "nice to meet" English speaking folks.  English is the weird one here, not your students.

So, please, stop freaking out when your students always say, "Nice to meet you."  Slow down, explain the different perceptions of the verb "to meet".  They learn this simple phrase early in their language development long before they can understand the conceptual, abstract uses of phrases and verbs.  They are doing their best.  They are using a new language as best they can, based on the rules that they know.  They are trying to be respectful, so take a moment to respect them and their effort.  You are their teacher after all, not their school yard bully.

Second, lets look at how we judge the adults we meet.  Excited Korean's will often refer to everything they show you as being "famous".  Many Westerners get all caught up in this.  Annoyed because Korean's think everything is famous.  The Westerners start going on and on about how "Korea isn't all that" and Korean's need to learn that that what they haven't isn't the most famous thing ever.

Now, before we even get into the linguistic issues I would like to say, "This is their country.  Let them be as proud of it as they want to be."  We should all be proud of where we live and think it's the best.  It's not a big deal and doesn't make where you are from any less awesome.  Just because Korean's love Korea, doesn't affect that I think Alaska is the best thing to ever happen to the world.

But back to linguistics,  in Korean "famous" and "known for" are the same word.  So, when Korean's learn English they don't see any difference between "famous" and "known for".  They will just throw famous around like it ain't no thing.  When they say someplace is, "Famous for their noodles",  it's the same thing as saying they're , "Known for their noodles".  It's not some over prideful statement. It's just a statement of fact.

I beg of you, take a moment to consider the world from a perspective not your own.  Step back and respect the world around you before you jump on judging the world around you.  You are living in a new culture, in a new country, with people that don't speak the same language as you.  Maybe, just maybe, you don't have all the information.

Weight, Weight Don't Tell Me

This is UFC fighter Rashad Evans Height: 5'11 Weight: 205 lbs

This is UFC fighter Phil Davis Height: 6'2" Weight: 205 lbs

This is average Lanae

Height: 5'9"

Weight: 220 lbs

Yes, that's right. 

I seriously outweigh 

Light Heavyweight UFC fighters

who are 2" to 5" taller than I am.

You know what else?

That's ok.

Want to know something else?

Folks around me are fine with it as well.

Yah, even here in Korea.

In fact, many take me aside to let me know that -

even though I don't fit into the normal "stereotype"-

there's nothing wrong with it, 

I am still pretty,

and I don't need to go on a diet.

(To be honest this does make me giggle.)

Sure, many of my students call me Hulk Teacher 

and express surprise that a woman can be strong,

but they get used to it and they accept it.

Even better, we get to talk about it.

I'm thankful I don't fit into the norm.

I'm thankful I'm strong.

I'm thankful my kids bring it up.

Most of all, I'm thankful we get to talk

about all the ways women can be beautiful.

So, the next time someone comments on your looks.

Accept the challenge and talk about it.

Be confident in who you are and open to discussion.

What they think doesn't decide your choices,

but talking about it does give you a chance

to share a new perspective 

 that they might not have considered.

Feeling Super Phat

Speling Mistaques

No errors were staged in the writing of this article.

 
Without a doubt,

I can't spell.

Nor can I proof

my own work.

Dyslexia and computer screens 

show me what I want to see,

not what truly exists.

When I was younger this made me a captive,

terrified of communicating in written words.

Whenever I had to write I had gut wrenching anxiety,

because I knew my heartfelt words would not be read, only judged.

 Thankfully, though, people mocked me.

They ridiculed me and they berated me.

They did it endlessly, tirelessly, bitterly
until I just didn't care anymore.

One day, their judgment set me free.
I realized that, 

even if I spelled everything perfectly,it wouldn't really matter.
The people that were the hardest on me
weren't trying to help,
they weren't going to hear my voice,
they just wanted to be right.

That was when I realized
I didn't want to be perfect.
I wanted to be flawed.
I wanted to be mistaken.
I wanted to be happy.

Now that I teach English I remember this battle,
and although I hold my students
to an exceptionally high standard in class,
when they open up their hearts
I put away my red pen.
For me,
there are no errors
when the heart is on the line.
It's only their thoughts that counts.


 

Cute Ghouls and Monsters Galore

Candy and games translate into any language.

My Little Monsters Just Love Halloween.

Even the "grown up" ones can't resist the fun.

Of course the little boys can't get enough of being Monsters.

The girls are especially scary, but they are darn cute.

Warning: candle light classrooms might leading to napping.

Vampire Coin Toss is A Class Favorite

It'za Pizza Pie

The fix'ns for Toaster Pizza.

 Cooking classes are days of delight, horror, fear, joy and anticipation.

Every month they ask the day before, 

"Teacher, is it delicious?"

Each month I answer, 

"No, it's awful.  That's why we are making it."

They've never made anything quite like this.

It looked like a mother's love.

Le Chef

Internal Medicine

Dear Me, Myself & I,

Please take a moment to remember that you have never, in fact, learned anything faster because your teacher sounded annoyed with you.  More pointedly, the more annoyed your teacher sounded the less likely you are to pay any attention in class or make any effort.

Since this is a fact that has proven itself true for 36 years, what makes you think your students are any different?

Loves, Yourself.



_________________________

Dear Yourself,

So what I hear you saying is that I should stop being a lazy teacher and blaming my students for my own failures.  Gosh, that seems like a lot of work.

Hearts,
Me, Myself & I

_________________________

Dear Me, Myself & I,

That's why they call it a job and that's why they pay you money.  If children could learn by osmosis we would just stick English books under their pillows and stop wasting our hard earned money on you.  Now quit being a lazy educator and listen to your students needs instead of getting annoyed just because they didn't catch it the first time you raced through the lesson.   That's why you have 40 minutes to teach and not 15.  This is about ALL the students learning, not just the smart ones.

Best of luck,
Yourself

_________________________

Dear Yourself,

Hum, you sound a bit annoyed with me that I didn't listen to you the first time around.  Does it bother you that you've had to explain this too me twice?  Hum, it seems you aren't all that different from myself.

Hugs,
Me, Myself & I
 

Dig'n The New Digs

Waiting to learn what my apartment would be

was like waiting to find out if Santa

thought I had been naughty or nice.

Would I get coal or candy?

It seems I was a good girl this year.

Digital flat screen TV and digital cable.

New furniture to mix with my lost and found pieces.

A well planned and useful kitchen.

Another beautiful bed which I don't really use yet, my sofa is so nice.

Spacious area for doing things.