Wednesday, October 31, 2012

Cute Ghouls and Monsters Galore

Candy and games translate into any language.
My Little Monsters Just Love Halloween.
Even the "grown up" ones can't resist the fun.
Of course the little boys can't get enough of being Monsters.
The girls are especially scary, but they are darn cute.
Warning: candle light classrooms might leading to napping.
Vampire Coin Toss is A Class Favorite

Tuesday, October 30, 2012

Trick or Treat?

"One's face is equal to or stupider then one's butt" - Strongbad
This year I celebrated a week of Happy Hallow Harry-Boo-Boo,
in honor of officially living with him longer then I've lived without him.
Somehow our circles continue to intertwine.

We've been through murder and high-water together,
so sometimes we hate each other,
sometimes we're sick of each other,
sometimes we can't stand each other's stupid faces.

However, we both know those times will pass,
and that said feelings have little to do with the other person,
and a lot to do with our own personal demons aquired
from a life filled with more then it's fair share of tragedy.

So, instead of putting so much focus on our feelings,
we just love each other despite the crazy,
despite our night terrors,
our anxieties,
our rage,
and despite the worlds that have crumbled around us.

So, I guess what I'm trying to say is that,
I love Harri-bou's smiley, 
never changing, 
always loyal,  
ever encouraging,
eternally supportive,
blindly devoted,
ever handsome,
stupid face.


Pigs are flying.
Hell has frozen over.
These are facts.

How do I know this to be true?
Tonight, on the way home, 
after feeling just a little sick all day,
I had the compulsion to run.

So - calling my brains bluff - 
I tightened up my backpack,
tossed my scarify jauntily over my shoulder,
and I ran.

Not only did I run, 
but I ran easily
and for a long distance.
until finally I willed myself to stop.

Not because I was tired 
or physically uncomfortable,
but because the overt and disturbing strangeness of it all.

I don't run for the bus.
I distrust anyone who runs as a hobby. 
In fact,  I consider running to be on of my sister's few faults.

A person like me simple does not,
in any sense or shape,
 just suddenly become a runner.
Especially when they are looking 40 in it's smug little face.

It's just not natural.

So I pondered that maybe I had died,
or possibly there was a glitch in the matrix.
However, I still had a yearning for spaghetti 
so I wrote those options off as unlikely.

Still, the desire to run nipped at my heals.
I wanted to fly along the rice paddies,
like I used to fly across the tundra.

I fought it.
I wandered slowly
in a lazy pattern.

Yet, even as I bounded up my stairs
in anticipation of tonights coverage of arial bacon and a frozen hades,
my mind lingered outside in the cool autumn air.
I just wanted to feel my feet floating across the ground once again.

Sunday, October 21, 2012

Pretty (Isn't that enough?)

There's really no story here.
The fall is just beautiful in Sokcho.
That really should be enough.

Wednesday, October 17, 2012

"Safe Road Happy Drive"

Let's talk getting your Korean Drivers License from scratch.
We're talking all the way from start to finish and beginning to end.

There are three basic reasons to do this:

1.  You can't get to the Embassy because of work.
2.  You don't want to turn over your license from home.
3.  You don't have a license because you're a weirdo like me.

Near the Yongin office there is a coffee shop if you arrive early. So just make a day of it and enjoy yourself.
I have basically three thoughts after completing the process.

First of all:

 Don't be afraid,
it's not a big deal.  

Second of all:

Pay attention to the videos,
they are the most important thing.


It's pretty darn inexpensive, maybe $50 - $75 bucks in the end.

You will take three tests:

1. 40 Question Computer Test
2. Closed Course "I can operate a car" Test
3. "On the open road" Driving Test

Before each test you will watch a video with English subtitles.
These videos have all the answers you need to pass.
Do NOT blow them off.


"Health Exam"

The Paperwork:


  1. It might be confusing at first!  Just relax.  Show people your paperwork and they will show you where to go next.  Sure, nothing is really in English but they get you where you need to go when you show them your paper.
  2. Don't panic if you don't have time to get photos before you go.  They totally have a booth there where you can get it done.
  3. Have your home address ready.  You will have to write it a lot.
  4. The Health Check is nothing much at all:  They went so fast through the eye exam I didn't even have time to answer most of the time but I still seemed to pass.  

Written Exam cattle call.

The Written: 


  1. The English exam is only one Saturday a month at 9:30am at the Yongin branch.
  2. You need to show up about 8:45am - 9:00am to cue.  You'll need to get a number before watching the video and it's busy so don't mess around.
  3. Pay attention to the crazy pre-test video.  It holds the clues to what you need to know.  It's way more important then reading the test book.
  4. Be warned, once you get into the test, the wording can be totally whack.  The previous blog I mentioned gives great advice on how to pass by looking for key words.
  5. The screens can be very hard to read and many of the questions you must select TWO answers and not one.  If you don't select two you can go back and fix it.  You won't automatically get it wrong.

The "I Can Operate A Car" Closed Course: 


  1. You can actually get in trouble for going "to fast" on things as well as "to slow".  We aren't talking about exceeding the speed limit.  I'm talking about checking your wipers fast or your blinkers fast.
  2. Also, when they say "check" something, they don't mean "check it".  They mean do it EXACTLY like this video tells you to do it: CLICK HERE  OR  Put this address in your browser:  (Also, when I say exactly I mean EXACTLY!)
  3. In theory they will show you this video before you take the exam.  However, be warned.  The first time I took the test they did not.  A women stood up and rambled on about stuff for a while and they shipped us out the door.  I failed spectacularly.  After watching the video it was easy breezy.

The "On the Open Road" Driving Exam: 


  1. They will give you a copy of the route when you make your test appointment.   That means you can actually practice the route if you have a car.  I didn't bother since I don't  have a car.  The instructor told be when and where to turn.  He could say left, right and straight - however he kept getting them confused.  This is why the route map helped, I had a good idea of where I was headed so I knew when he said the wrong thing.
  2. You need to pay attention to the points.  There are some big things you can lose a lot of points for like "Checking the parameter of your car before you start".
  3. At first I thought it was "bring a friend" day at the DMV, then I realized you take your test with another person.  One person drives out and the other person drives back.  Pretty efficient actually.
  4. You will have to parallel park.  However, it is done on a closed course with nobody around so the stress is minimal.  The old man who took the test at the same time as me was, literally, the worst parker I could imagine and he got his license just fine.  You've got THREE minutes to get the job done so just take your time.  
  5. There were no surprises.  They don't shout at you to STOP, or tell you to do down some weird road.  It's straight forward and if you know the basics of driving you will be just fine.
  6. Please Read the Blog: Computer - Student - Tester to learn more about the COMPUTERIZED version of this test.

As you can see, 
depending on your availability,
it is possible to complete the testing in one week.


So, don't be scared.
Oh, and I took my test in Yongin!

Friday, October 12, 2012

It'za Pizza Pie

The fix'ns for Toaster Pizza.
 Cooking classes are days of delight, horror, fear, joy and anticipation.
Every month they ask the day before, 
"Teacher, is it delicious?"
Each month I answer, 
"No, it's awful.  That's why we are making it."

They've never made anything quite like this.
It looked like a mother's love.
Le Chef

Thursday, October 11, 2012

You Are Not Lost, Just Besotten

With your dignity in tact,
you lay in waste. 

You have set aside your hope,
but grace you've not forsaken.

Somewhere someone watches,
holding onto hope for you.

Waiting for you to find the stamina,
to walk a while more.

Big Dreams and Forgotten Things

 In piles and remnants,
that often pass unknown,
there is a documentation
of dreams and hopes
of loves and of loses.

They are fruition.
They are abandonment.
 The are hope that it might end well, 
not today, 
but tomorrow or tomorrow or tomorrow.

 To find these and other lost things, visit:
 인제군 인제읍 귀둔1리 5반 1004, Inje 252-804

Thursday, October 4, 2012

Sprechen sie deutsche?

My spur of the moment decision to head to German Village couldn't have been more perfect.  
Oktoberfest (독일마을 옥토버페스) was just the taste of home that I needed. 
It brought back many memories for me,
and it made me miss my family a great deal.

There was something special about seeing the culture from which my family came
mixed with the culture which I have recently adopted.
A weird kind of connecting the dots.

We have arrived at 독일마을 옥토버페스.
So many things I love all in one place.  It feels like family.
Can't wipe the smile off my face.
New friends make it all the more fun.
The German/Korean Music was awesome.
Everyone was in the spirit.
Even taking it to the stage.

The awesomeness was almost more then I could handle.
Steins were raised and songs were sung.
I even pretended to drink beer :p

No festival is complete without a clown on stilts.
Of course we didn't just celebrate Germans, we celebrated everyone with dance styles from all over.
With beers, comes excellent posing.
Even the pets came along for the ride.
Last year they sold over 30,000 German sausages.
Beer was shipped from Germany just for the occasion.
The only real complaint, is that they could have used more of these.