Sunday, March 31, 2013

Avoiding An EPIC Groundhog Day

And buy this book....
Need Information in English while in Korea?
From Seoul Call 1330
From Outside Seoul Call Area Code +1330

There is a big change/life crisis that happens two or three years into living abroad, and right now both myself and many of my friends are swimming through it.  We don't know where we fit in anymore.  We've moved past the shiny newness and we are living our lives just like we always wanted.  We want to make this transition with grace, but it isn't always that easy.

It's hard not to get irritated and annoyed by the new folks who beg for advice and then tell you your wrong.  Or worse, beg for the advice then do the exact opposite and come back to complain about the outcome you told them was inevitable.   If you aren't careful, your life becomes an epic (or GEPIC) groundhog day of rotating emotional crisis as expats cycle through each year.

This weekend my friend and I talked about our desire to help new people because we value those that helped us, but we admitted to each other we both struggle with feelings of frustration when we do so.  Mostly because the time and effort that is put into helping is often dismissed and taken for granted, as if those that lived here have unlimited resources and time to help newbies get settled - endlessly.

Maybe the hardest part is that when we say, "Hey, why don't you learn a bit of the language?" and expats answer, "Why?  I don't really need to?"  Um, actually you do need to.  Right now the local people and longterm expats are taking time away from things they love such as their interests, jobs, friends and families in order to take care of you.  They are kind and they are patient, but they would really rather be doing something else.

For example, my friend works with 70 other foreign teachers - most of whom are changing over on a regular basis.  Just do the math on how much time it would take in a week to answer all those questions.  It's kind of exhausting to consider.  Let's say half of those teachers need 10 minutes of help with their personal life each week.  That's 5 hours a week of work.

Ok and this is just straight up helpfulness.  Then factor in the emotional crisis that folks hit 6-8 months into their first move abroad and the hours they want to spend talking about "how hard it is here" and there goes the rest of our free time in a heartbeat.

It's not that we hate new people, it's that we actually don't have enough time in our days to be that helpful.    The truth of the matter is that our lives have moved on.  We've made friends, settled into jobs, learned the language and gained hobbies.  It isn't "hard here" for us.  It's just life and we've accepted what we have given up and we love what we've gained.

The fact of the matter is that we must filter out all the "help me's" so that we can accomplish our lives.  We can't live within and endless groundhog day of culture shock crises, "can somebody give me the bus schedule again" requests and friends who come and go like the wind.  Plus, the fact of the matter is that it's hard enough to move and accept a new culture and a new life without always being drug back to the beginning.

In the end, instead of staying and letting myself due to newbies inconsideration, I've moved on.  Removing myself from any lists or organizations aimed at helping folks get settled.  It's the right choice for me to step of the wheel and let it roll on by.

What I will do is keep sharing things I love and find useful via this blog and www.theexpattable.com.  This is what I can do and this is what I love to do.  However, answering endless questions about bus schedules, I'll leave that up to the help hotline: (information via http://www.korea4expats.com/article-informaton-help-line-1330.html)
Need information regarding Seoul? Call 1330!

Need information for outside Seoul? Call area code + 1330.

When you need English assistance or travel information, just dial 1330, and a bilingual operator will offer you detailed information on tourist sites, transportation, restaurants, etc. The service is available 24/7. It the information you need is for an area outside Seoul, just enter the area code of that region and then press 1330. Some of the regional offices close after business hours, but no worries, your call will automatically transfer to the 27/7 line in Seoul.

Note: Calls made to 1330 are charge at the local call rate even if they are from a cell phone (which charge long distance call rates).
You don’t have to be in Korea to contact the Travel Help Line. If you’re abroad, just press 82+ area code + 1330.

Available languages: Chinese, English, Japanese and Korean.
Also, you don’t have to be a tourist to use the Help Line. Foreign residents call 1330 for all kinds of information – some related to travel, some related to public transportation, a lot related to question re daily living or for interpretation when dealing with taxi drivers, shop clerks, etc.
Korean Area Codes (note: when calling from abroad, drop the (0)
AreaSeoulGyeonggiIncheonGangwonChungnamDaejeonChungbukBusan
Number(0)2(0)31(0)32(0)33(0)41(0)42(0)43(0)
51
AreaUlsanDaeguGyeongbukGyeongnamJeonnamGwangjuJeonbukJeju
Number(0)52(0)53(0)54(0)55(0)61(0)62(0)63(0)64
Long Distance From Korea:
To make a long distance call from Korea, dial 001 then the rest of the number. 

Wednesday, March 20, 2013

The Search For Life


After a winter of thinking, 
spring has brought such lovely light.
It's so nice to be comfortable,
my life having found a pleasant gate.

It's interesting the evolution 
from isolation to integration.

I have forgotten what was once strange.
It now seems so normal and obvious.
Ways of thinking that seemed ridiculous,
now seem filled with reason and purpose.

Of course, I'm certainly an "outsider",
I'm aware of that,
but just because one is an outsider
that doesn't mean one isn't integrated.
 At least for me...

I see integration as comfort,
and I am comfortable.
 
So I now find myself more concerened
with participating in the world around me
rather than observing the world around me.

And I just want to report from the other side that
there is a life beyond our borders.
Whether it be 
emotional,
spiritual
or physical.

There is life out there.
All we have to do is take the steps.



Saturday, March 16, 2013

Last Call




Volunteering isn't about feeling sorry for people,
it's about sharing a bit of yourself
that's the same as them.







Reservations

Two years have brought many changes.
My interests are more focused,
More and more time is spent at home,
and I find myself wanting to become 
a part the world around me
and not just an observer.
No, I'm not "signing" off blogging.

I've just decided to branch out and turn
into it's own thing.
My local community 
loves the food,
loves the recipes,
and loves the idea of sharing a table.
It's time the project stood on its own two feet. 

 In fact, since I have a private tutor right now,
I'm using the opportunity to become proficient
at explaining the culinary arts in Korean.
Last week I spent two hours explaining
the ins-and-outs of Spanish Korean Fusion food.
Funny how I can't explain the weather, 
but can easily discuss the details of curing fish.

So, in summery I'm NOT 
giving up blogging on Chasing Tales.
I'm just refining the conversation.
If you are interested in following my food adventure,
just join me at the
we always have room for one more.

Sunday, March 10, 2013

Re-Kindle A Passion for Life

Celebrating A New Adventure with a New Cover.
Chasing Tales says,
"BUY ME FOR YOUR KINDLE.
I'm super cute and fun on weekends." 

So, I'm just about the worst about
sharing things I've done
because I'm more interested 
in things that are yet to come.

Still, if you like reading this blog
the inspiration for the life I now live.

Not only that, but it's now available
Yup, for $2.99
(or more depending on
where you are in the world)
you can go on 
a virtual adventure and
support this blog and my coffee habit.

All proceeds from my novel 
go directly to funding ridiculous projects, 
supporting silly adventures and 
writing the next novel in the series 
"Lost Things".

WARNING: Side-effects of reading Chasing Tales have been reported.  Be aware that day dreaming, joy, inspiration and hope for the future have been reported by all readers.  Additional side-effects reported are: telling people you love them, wanderlust, inner reflection and motivation to try new things.  If you experience any of these side-effects you should immediately consult your best friend to discuss them in total, preferably over coffee at that lovely little shop you just saw last week but haven't tried yet.  If symptoms continue for longer then 3 - 6 months running away on an adventure of your own is suggested by 9 out of 10 professional vagabonds.

Good book
and happy reading.